The Battle of the Gulf of Mexico – Mike Delaney for FAWM25 (To the tune of the "Battle of New Orleans")

In 2025, the orange menace returned He won the vote, though you’d think we woulda learned He had a pressing need to come up with a diversion So, he dreamed up a weird conversion

He thought and thought but most of it was crap ‘Til gazed into space as he looked at a map He renamed one specific place in particula’ The Gulf of Mexico is now the Gulf of America

Chorus: He fired his mouth and the press went a-runnin’ They said, “Sir, we’ll do anything to stay in your show Only AP complained; that was really stunning ‘Til the Gulf of America is back to the Gulf of Mexico

AP was the only reporters to take a stand No other journalists brave enough to lend a hand So, AP got banished from the White House press corps They weren’t allowed to report anything from there any more

For 400 years Gulf of Mexico’s good enough The President should focus on more important stuff But AP kept pointing out who picked the new name And that this distraction is a real pathetic shame

Chorus

This renaming thing now has a life of its own Renaming places is an issue overblown What you say matters less than your actions We shouldn’t feed into this petty distraction

Bridge: Will Ukraine be able to keep its name? Will the Supreme Court’s rulings be obeyed? Will America become a Russian Province? game shame tame Will our democracy become tattered and frayed?

Different Final Chorus?