I fell over backwards Into the hot tub I fell over backwards Into the pool My skin was on backwards And people were laughing My skin was on wrong And I looked so uncool

When I was a leader And you were a straggler When I was a leader And you were too slow I stopped counting backwards I stopped at eleven I stopped counting backwards And finally pressed Go

I used to be a skipping stone I was top of the hop as a skipping stone I used to be a skipping stone But if you skip to the end, my friend, No surprise for the wise It turns out I’m a sinking stone

I fell over backwards Right onto the mattress I fell over backwards Already asleep You’re looking for leaders In all the wrong places We’re all out of shepherds We only have sheep

I dreamed of a classroom On final exam day I’m there in the classroom I’m stuck to my chair I forgot to wear pants I hope no one notices I can’t read the questions It gets worse from there

I used to be a skipping stone I was top of the hop as a skipping stone I used to be a skipping stone But if you skip to the end, my friend, No surprise for the wise It turns out I’m a sinking stone

Well, I asked the ship Would you kindly stop leaking? But the ship does not listen It wants to go down It’s so sad and lonely Despite the bananas Ten thousand bananas They’re all gonna drown

If you’re looking for God And you don’t have his number Just call up the switchboard They’ll connect you for free But just for the future To call him directly In case you should need it That number is 3

I used to be a skipping stone I was top of the hop as a skipping stone I used to be a skipping stone But if you skip to the end, my friend, No surprise for the wise It turns out I’m a sinking stone

Now, all you young steam clouds Ambitious young moisture You wish you were rainclouds To wash down this dust But you missed the audition And fell off the waitlist You can’t pass the test If you don’t win their trust