Extreme Sports Canada: Senior Edition
Verse 1 Old Joe wakes up, snow's past the door, Grabs his shovel—"Not this time, no more!" Climbs to the roof with a daring stance, Yells to Marge, "I’ll show you my snow clearing dance”" Pre-Chorus Hold my dentures, watch me fly, I’ll ride this snow with a twinkle in my eye. Over the hedge, past the old birdbath, Straight to the driveway—slide that shovel, under my ass! Chorus We’re dodgin’ coyotes, we’re shovelin’ ice, Walkers are out, but we’re still precise! Can’t see for the blizzards, but we don’t despair, We strap on snowshoes, we’ll make it there! Verse 2
Now Marge needs a coffee, she’s feelin’ cold, Joe grabs his crampons—he’s feelin’ bold! Up to the frozen Tim’s, no fear, no doubt, Kicks open the door gives a—"Double-double" shout. Pre-Chorus Hold my knitting, watch me spin, my shopping cart’s flying past the bargain bin! From the east to the west, right down to the bay, Extreme sports in Canada, the senior way! Verse 3 Ran out of snow melt, so Marge takes a ride, Hits the ice hard — a polar bear glide! Joe grabs a broom, curls her hard to the right, Perfect form, she’s outta sight! Bridge Grocery run turns into a brawl, The Zamboni’s loose in the shopping mall! Two old guys fight over canned green beans, Marge breaks it up—"Boys, settle down, please!"

Verse 4 Waiting for the bus, but what’s that sound? A snowmobile pulls up, spitting ice all around! "Hop on, folks! Bingo’s at eight!" Old Joe revs it up—"Hey there’s no time to wait!" Chorus The neighbors cheer, the contest is tight, Shovels in hand, it’s a snowy fight! Joe digs deep, Marge moves fast, Clears the driveway—first place at last! Hooray!! Final Chorus We’re avoiding coyotes, while dodgin’ wheely. bins Walkers out in a storm, but they can’t feel their shins All the roads are closed, but we don’t despair, Just strap on some skates, we’ll make it there!

Ohh Canadaaa, we slip, and we slide, In the land of the cold, pure Canadian pride.