FAWM: "Honey Turtle Race

Honey Turtle Race - Loves Lament

2025 by @kc_

There is no demo for this song.

Liner Notes

For some reason was thinking of a honey badger and wanted something different and drove past a turtle crossing sign... Honey Turtle... and the tortoise's 'hare' had to appear! Just a stream of consciousness based on that!

Think it could be a story type folk song as is, formatted into a song, IDK... I got a kick out of it... FAWM get it down and edit later!!

Lyrics

Honey Turtle Race – Loves Lament

Be my honey turtle Race me oh so slow But at the first sign Of the finish line Be the hare and go, go, go

Dated models, manly men Whose demeanor made me swoon lightning off the starting line One step and done too soon

Other’s truly humble Treated me just like a queen Sprint for 100 yard or more But never made the final scene

Be my honey turtle Race me oh so slow A honey turtle just for me And make me glow glow glow

But if you bring the blades Padded gloves and stick You best be playing a-bove board Cause I’ll strip off any schtick

Won’t be cheering from the sidelines Let’s face off at center ice We’re in it for the love and fun A tie score would sure be nice

While the ice can sure be chilly A great skate, makes you hot and more Pass the puck and wonder will he Keep passing pucks ‘til we both score

When the buzzer sounds There’s no rolling of the dice Raced and skated pretty hard A tie score would sure be nice

Be my honey turtle Race me oh so slow But at the first sign Of the finish line Be the hare and go, go, go

Comments

@bradbrubaker 2025

Those second and third stanzas are funny! "Race me oh so slow" is a fantastic line. Fun write, overall.

@andrea 2025

Is this supposed to be naughty or is it just me? I think this is great. You have covered all the bases on what makes a poor 'relationship' and what would be nice. Win win!